Sissy's 30th Birthday Gift

This past Saturday, my sister had the misfortune of turning 30.  Not only was this a terrifying event for her, but it was a stark reminder that I will be following in her footsteps in approximately 13 months.  Excuse me while I go get Botox now.

While we spent the better part of Saturday mourning the loss of Brynn's 20s, we kicked off the evening by drinking some vino and opening presents.  Before I get into the details of the evening (that will be a separate post), I figured I would give you some details on the fun gift idea I did to celebrate her 30th.

I struggled with figuring out what the "right" gift was since it is kind of a big-deal birthday, and I am a big believer in celebrating birthdays (I mean, what other day of the year is it all about you??).  I found an awesome gift idea from this blog and tried to tweak it to make it perfect for my sister.

I included a card with my gift that read something to the effect of "Now that you're 30...and a mom, you may be wondering where all the years went!  Here is a little emergency kit for when you need to feel young!"

Along with the card was a gift basket filled with individual gifts to make sis feel like a kid (sort of).

I got a black wicker basket she can re-use along with wrapping and gift tags at Hobby Lobby.

Play at Bath time!  In this box I included a bunch of Bath Bombs from Lush, and a loofah & rubber duckie from Bath & Body Works.

Play Dress Up!  I got her a beautiful necklace from Banana Republic (that I really wanted for myself!).

Have a Slumber Party!  This box had a super cute PJ set from Vicky's Secret :-)

Give Yourself a Makeover! I included a bottle of OPI nail polish, a new lip gloss from Bobbi Brown, and a new cream eye shadow stick also from Bobbi Brown.

When all else fails, have a glass of wine!  Duh - I included a bottle of Conundrum, one of sissy's faves.

I have to admit, it was sort of fun trying to think of things to include and in the end I think it turned out perfect.  Plus, it would be a great gift for a range of budgets since you can scale up or scale back however you like.  Plus, who doesn't want to feel young every now and then!

Post-Giving

Happy Monday friends!  My apologies for being a little late to the "Thanksgiving recap" posts...I guess I over-indulged a bit over the holiday (4 pies, 3 boxes of GiGis mini cupcakes and an entire batch of pumpkin cookies with frosting - and I had my share of all of them) and needed a week to recover from food shame. 

I just wanted to share a few pics from our weekend.  I hope you all had a wonderful Thanksgiving and had some time in the midst of food and football for reflection on what it means to be truly thankful.

After spending the past 3 years in Georgia and Texas for the holiday, I was thrilled it was once again my parents who were hosting the festivities in Louisville.  We had about 20 people at our dinner and 17 players for our annual Thursday morning football game.  Last year my aunt got adorable aprons for all the gals and shirts for all the boys (the were going to the Texas vs Texas A&M game), I decided to order everyone gameday shirts this year.  I am happy to report that for the 5th year in a row, my mom was picked last by the team captains.  I am also happy to report that my team (The Wish Boners) won in a last minute touchdown play. 

After football, we all headed back to the house and showered up and hunkered down for some football.  I spent the rest of my morning working on a puzzle with my nephew and stuffing my face with chicken ball (sounds wierd, but its delicious).  We at dinner about 4:00, followed some rushed family photos before the sunset.

The whole crew!

The gals :)

Silly girl shot

Me and Husband

Close up...we like blue, I guess :)

Just my family!

All in all it was a wonderful weekend, and I wanted to cry when I had to get up at 6am on Monday.  Needless to say, the past week has been about begging my body for forgiveness.  After 3.5 weeks on the south beach diet leading up to Thanksgiving, even my 4 mile daily runs throughout the weekend did not make up for all the sweets.  No regrets though...holidays only happen once a year!

What I'm Loving Today

Good morning readers!  I'm just sitting here tonight smelling yummy smells in my house and watching Taylor Swift Storytellers on DVR and waiting for my husband to get home, and I am smiling because I am blessed.  What a great day for a link up for WILW, don't you think?

To begin, I am loving that Thanksgiving is in 8 days.  My aunts and uncles and cousins and my sweet nephews will all be in one place, and that is my favorite thing on earth.  It doesn't happen often.  Plus, this is the first Thanksgiving I will get to spend with my man, so that's a double bonus.  Here's a look at Thanksgivings past and our "girls photo"...

2008

2009

2010

2011

Secondly, I am loving that I got to have brunch with two of my best friends on Sunday.  I hate when life gets in the way of making time for those we love.  That's the big huge bummer about getting older (that and all the bills...I hate those).  I love being able to catch up and just do a pulse check to make sure we are all still alive.  Sorry no pics from brunch...sometimes it's just not the time and place :-)


I am loving kind of sort of figuring out what I am getting everyone for Christmas!  I have been making a list for about a month, and figuring out what to get everyone is frankly the hardest part.  I really feel like I've got a jump on the game this year!  Cross your fingers that I will be halfway done by the end of November (that's my goal).


Also loving that my Pottery Barn stockings came in yesterday and they match our living room and decor perfectly.  I can't wait to hang them and decorate!

I'm loving that I get to kiss all over these guys in just over a week.  They melt my heart.

I'm loving that after a year of living together, my dogs within the last month have become total cuddle buddies.  Although, I find this completely bizarre that for  11 months they slept on their own dog beds and now they just sleep on the one....

Lastly...and this is the best one...I am LOVING that my husband starts a new job on Monday. It's very gratifying to see him so happy and excited about new opportunities that have come his way. More importantly, I am excited that for the first time in our relationship, we will have the same work schedule. Huge bonus. I just like hanging out with him... :-)


Happy Wednesday Y'all!

The Most Wonderful Time of the Year

I'll admit, hearing Christmas music on the radio the other day completely caught me off guard.  I had to stop and remember what day was for a minute, and then it dawned on me...it's November.  Where the hell did the year go??  Realizing that the world is officially in "holiday mode" reminded me of two things...I really need to get a head start on my Christmas shopping this year, and secondly...this is my favorite time of the year.

Why is it my favorite time of the year?  Well, for obvious reasons...time with family, being thankful, warm fires, and all things Christmas...but there is also another reason I love this time of year.  It's when I fell in love. 

Growing up I always assumed I would fall in love one day, imagined what it would be like and who it would be with.  I actually thought I would fall in love many times...knew I would have my heart broken too, but I looked forward to experiencing those feelings that I have read about, seen in movies, and heard stories of all my life. 

But having gone through all of my college years with only minor flings and certainly no boys to write home about (why are boys such idiots around this age??), I started to get a little worried.  In the years after college, I dated everyone.  Everyone.  I kept my hopes up that my person was out there still and eventually the timing would be right for us.  Most of the men I dated were nice guys, some of them even great guys who I had strong feelings for.  But I knew even during my best days with them that it was not love.  That didn't stop me from being devastated when things ended with some of them...and it certainly didn't stop me from being annoyed to jump back into the dating pool either. 

By my mid-20s, I started to wonder...What if I NEVER fall in love?  Or more specifically...How will I KNOW I'm in love?  Has anyone else wondered that? 

By the fall of 2010, something happened.  This boy who had been in and out of my life for years...who at one time I could almost picture my life with him....who had broken my heart many times...was trying to find a way back into my life.  I tread carefully...very carefully...through the fall.  It was filled with late night text messages, (second) first dates, and lots of answers to questions about our past and what went wrong.  By November, I knew things were different with this boy than they ever had been before, and even though I had feelings for him since the day I met him, I still worried about whether I would know if this was love.

Call me crazy, but I always thought falling in love would be fireworks and hot pink, and undeniable, and without a doubt...and I thought I would know the second it happened.  I think that's what we've been taught.

But by November of 2010, all I knew is that this guy made me really happy.  After agreeing that we would not be seeing anyone else but each other (a first for us in our 3 years), I immediately left for New York City on a girls trip in mid-November.  In one of the most amazing cities in the world, I longed for Lexington, KY and more time with him.  Funny how that happens.  When I turned on my phone after our plane landed on our return flight, I had a video from my guy...it was of him playing a Jason Mraz song that still resonates with me to this day.

It's funny how sometimes a song or a lyric can perfectly capture a feeling..."All I really wanna do is love you, a kind much closer than friends use...but I still can't say it after all we've been through..."  Maybe he was wondering the same thing as me.

I was only home for a week before I promptly left for Atlanta for Thanksgiving...another week apart.  I longed for home again, even surrounded by the people I love most in the world.  Maybe that was a small clue.  But I still wasn't sure.  I made the drive from Atlanta to Lexington in near record time after Thanksgiving and spent the next day with him, running errands and putting up my Christmas tree together...another first.

I helped him pick out Christmas gifts for his family and he begrudgingly watched Love Actually, and It's a Wonderful Life and The Holiday with me.  And he agreed to spend Christmas day with me at my parents' house...which in the land of relationships is a big freakin' deal.  With his job being the way it is, he had to work Christmas Eve and the day after Christmas, which meant we couldn't drive up together. 

We decided that he would drive up on Christmas Eve after spending some time with his Aunt and Uncle after work.  Unfortunately, mother nature was not cooperative with our plans and it snowed furiously that evening.  I sat with my family wondering what time he would leave his aunt and uncle's house, and if it would be early enough.  I worried about the weather and if he would change his mind about coming and I'll admit, I was already planning on yelling at him if he called to say he wasn't coming.  That night, the hour and 15 minute drive to my parents house took him over two hours.  I waited up for him long after the rest of my family had gone to sleep and greeted him when he arrived after 1:00am.

Later that morning, we opened presents, and he got to know my family (he had already met my parents) and take part in our holiday traditions.  Having him there felt right to me.  He later admitted that he had never been so scared driving before as he was driving through the winter storm that Christmas Eve to see me.  On Christmas night, we ate dinner and relaxed together and around 9:00, he said he had to drive back.  I watched him pack his things and begged him to stay the night (he had to work early the next morning), but he couldn't.  Even though I would be home in another day or two, I felt devastated that he had to head back so soon. 

After he left, he sent me a text message that said, "I think I'm crazy about you" and I cried. 

Source: nerdfighter-art.tumblr.com via Bobbie on Pinterest

It wasn't fireworks, and time did not stop, but that was the moment I can trace back and vividly know that I was in love.  It didn't happen overnight or in that one moment.  It was a collection of things...going to a basketball game, eating dinner together, watching a movie, opening his poorly wrapped Christmas gifts, greeting him at the door on Christmas Eve and watching him introduce himself to my sister and brother-in-law for the first time in his pajamas. 

It's a bunch of silly moments like that which stick out in my head and remind me why I love this time of year more than ever...I get to relive our love story.  This year I am more thankful than ever though, because after 5 years of friendship, dating, not dating, being engaged, and now married...we will finally get to spend out first Thanksgiving together.  A long time overdue, don't you think?

Our second "first date" to a UK basketball game

Out for drinks with friends a few weeks before Christmas

At my grandparents' house on Christmas day

New Year's Eve

Do you have a holiday love story?  Did you struggle to realize what love was and recognize the difference? 

The ugly side of horse racing

Source: google.com via Taryn on Pinterest

One of the best things about living in Kentucky is, by far, getting to take part in the sport of horse racing.  No one does big hats, bourbon and betting better than folks in Kentucky.  It's a privilege to be among this sport, but it can also be devastating at the same time. 

This past weekend we spent a beautiful day at Keeneland tailgating by the fire pit and drinking bourbon and mimosas.  Since my in-laws were in town, we wanted to treat them to a day at the fall meet since it is a staple around Lexington and one of our favorite things to do this time of year. 

The day started off wonderfully...a little cold, but nothing a nice fire can't help with!  We grilled tri-tip steaks and ate and enjoyed the company of those we so rarely see.  After a couple hours of cornhole and tailgating, and watching the first 3 races from outside the track, husband and I decided to go in and place our bets for the next few races. 

While the rest of our gang stayed outside we made our bets for the 4th race based largely on the names of the horses and my intrinsic need to bet at least one long shot in each race.  We settled in to watch the races in the Mezzanine bar...me with my wine and husband with his bourbon (which he snuck in via his boot).  The boy picked the winner in the first race and tripled his first bet...a great start to the day!  I was disappointed to see that my horse, along with one other, did not even finish the race.

We thought nothing more of it and enjoyed the rest of our afternoon among the winners and losers at the race track.  Just before our last race, we finally met up with my brother who had decided to join in the fun of losing money.  He asked us if we had heard what happened after we left our tailgate....we had not heard a thing.

He began to tell us the story, in way to much detail, about an injured horse that had a significant affect on the members of our families.  We left after the next race and rejoined our parents at the tailgates, asking what had happened in their own words. 

I stood with my dad as he told me about the race they had watched right after we left the tailgate.  You see, we always pick a particular spot outside the track where you can stand and watch the horses go by right in front of you.  It's perfect because you can enjoy the beauty of the track without ever having to go inside.  Each time a race would get ready to run, everyone would move toward the fence to watch and cheer. 

But this time was different.  During the 4th race, 2 jockeys had been thrown from their horses....directly in front of my dad and my husband's parents.  One of the horse kept running, sans jockey, but the other horse was hurt....very, very hurt.

The medic van which follows right behind each race was out and tending to the jockeys instantly.  But the horse medics were nowhere to be found.  Our families stood in horror as they watched the remaining horse, confused, scared, and trying to stand on a leg that was no longer attached by any bone...only skin.  Time must have stood still while onlookers held their breaths in sick horror waiting for any sign of a medic for what was once a beautiful thoroughbred.  Without even thinking, my Dad....my hero....jumped over the fence and onto the track to stop the horse from trying to move and to comfort him.  For minutes he stroked him and talked to him until, after what seemed like and eternity, the horse medic finally arrived.  They immediately gave the horse a shot and moved him into the van, without a word to my Dad who was there when they weren't.

I listened as my Dad told this story while I watched my husband comfort his mom as she cried and recounted it for him.  I felt sick.  Literally...sick.  Not only hearing the story of what they were going through while we were inside enjoying ourselves, but watching my dad (who in my 28 years, I have never seen shed a tear) break down and cry telling me about this horse that he comforted in what we have no doubt were some of the last moments of his life.  His injuries, without a doubt, would call for him to be euthanized. 

Even as I sit here and type, I am holding back tears thinking of the recounting of what happened and feeling both relief that I wasn't there to witness for myself and sickness over wishing I was so I could have done something, even just comfort my mother-in-law or my Dad as the events transpired.  All who witnessed it said they will never, ever forget that moment and what they saw. 

I could not be more proud of my dad for what he did for that horse.  I have no idea where the medics for the horse were or why they took so long, but my dad did not hesitate...he jumped over that fence and offered what little comfort he could provide for a beautiful animal which we so take for granted every time we watch them race. 

Source: google.com via Erica on Pinterest

I left the track feeling very grateful for my dad and for my sweet animals at home who provide us with not only companionship, but also a huge dose of joy on a daily basis. 

 

What I'm Luuvving Wednesday



Hey y'all!  I'm linking up today for What I'm Loving Wednesday (via This Kind of Love)  I haven't done one of these is for-ev-er and thought it might be a fun little hump day post.  So, without further ado, here is what I'm loving today!

1

I'm loving that the weather has been pretty much perfect lately.  It's not too hot, not too cold...not quite summer, not quite fall.  I don't feel guilty about buying fall clothes because it's not scorching out, but I still get to wear my white shorts all over town with heels.  Win-win situation, if you ask me. 

Source: bing.com via Taryn on Pinterest

2

I'm loving that Jenn at Munchkinland Designs is hard at work on a little facelift for this lil' blog-o-mine.  She obviously rocked it out the first time, and is totally game to do it again.  Can't wait to see how it turns out, and of course, share it with all my lovely readers

3

I'm really loving that I finally feel like I have the time and the energy to work on my blog again.  Wedding planning was seriously not my bag...it made me cranky and stressed out, and my posts suffered because of it.  I'm loving that I get to be an active participant on my page again...thanks for sticking with me!

4

I'm loving that my husband is working on a guest post for me this week!  It's a twist on the "If you really knew me" posts that have been going around.  I was interested in his perspective on this topic and what he would share with all of you about me!  Thanks Kelly at Messy Dirty Hair for the idea!

5

I'm loving that the projects around our house are finally coming together and more importantly, coming to an end.  I will have lived here a year in October, and in that time, we have put down new flooring, painted every wall, painted all the cabinets, re-finished the counter tops, put up backsplash, and bought new furniture.  Whew!  It's been quite a challenge maintaining our sanity this past year, but we have managed.  The only things we have left are the floors in the master bathroom, mirror mate frames for the mirrors in our bathrooms, and sadly, new paint for the living room again!  Once we finished all the changes in the kitchen, I realized that our main room needed to be a different color, so back to Lowes we go!

6

I am loving that we have a jam-packed few months coming up - first labor day weekend with my sister coming to visit, Music Midtown in Atlanta in September, and Keeneland in October with (hopefully) a visit from the boy's family in there somewhere as well.  It's good to have great family and friends!

Source: google.com via Taryn on Pinterest

7

I'm loving that I finally discovered Gel Manicures a few months ago, and can finally have sassy looking nails for more than 5 days at a time.  The last one I had lasted a full month!  Aside from the nail re-growth, the ends of my nails still looked great!  How did I not discover this sooner?

8

I'm loving that I made the leap a few weeks back and got my wedding set soldered together and sizing beads put it.  I was really hesitant about taking the plunge, but I could not stand that my band kept turning upside down and my e-ring spun back and forth.  I couldn't get them sized down anymore due to my ginormous knuckles.  The jeweler assured me it was the best route, and 2 sizing beads later, they are stuck together and fit perfectly.

9

I'm loving that my life feels normal again.  I feel like I am enjoying the little things so much more these days.  This was what I was most looking forward to about our wedding...being married.  It was never about the day or the dress...that was just a bonus!

Source: helloandrea.blogspot.com via Taryn on Pinterest

10

I am loving that fall candles are starting to come out at Bath & Body Works!  I can't wait for them to go on promotion for 2 for $20 because I will be on that like white on rice. 

Source: google.com via Taryn on Pinterest

11

I am loving all my boys.  My choobie (Sawyer), Jax-man, and of course husband.  They are my favorite part of every day.

Why we have dogs

Forget all that mumbo jumbo about dogs being "man's best friend."  I'm gonna give you the low down skinny on why the boy and I have dogs...  I may say that it's because Cosmo told me 3.5 years ago that all single girls need dogs, but that's only partially the truth.  The boy "claims" he has a dog because our little Jax man was a rescue who needed a home, but that's probably something he just made up to meet chicks at the dog park.  You wanna know the real reason we have dogs???

It's because we are cheap.

No, really.  Forget that a bag of dog food costs us $40 every 2 weeks.  Forget that the LL Bean dogs beds set me back $200 and an angry call to their customer service.  Forget the fact that we got rid of our carpet in favor of laminate flooring because it was easier to clean up the dog hair.  Forget all that.  We have dogs because we are cheap skates when it comes to home security. 

About a month ago some guy came banging on our door at dinnertime (i.e., wine-time) talking about home security systems and could he give us a quote and all that jazz.  The boy being smart kept him confined to the porch and kindly told him that we weren't interested and joked that our dogs were our security system, blah blah blah.  Truth be told, our dogs are more for looks than show.  Jax is so desperate for attention that I feel confident that if anyone ever did come into our house, I think he'd invite them in for tea and a dog bone.  Sawyer, on the other hand may be able to ward off criminals by drowning (or disgusting) them in a pool of his own drool, but that's about as far as his defensive skills go.

We keep a pretty boring routine around our house.  We come home, go for a run, the dogs eat, the people eat, we relax/blog/clean etc.and around 11:00, the dogs lay on their overpriced dogs beds and pass out until the people get up in the morning.  Like clockwork, that is our lives (sad but true).  A few weeks ago, I rolled over at 2:00am to Sawyer's incessant barking from the living room.  I groggily said to husband, "ughhhh....why is he barking?"  to which he grumbled something inaudible and and buried his head in his pillow.  A few minutes later, he was still barking bloody murder when it dawned on me...this isn't normal.  I was suddenly alert.  "No seriously, why are they barking??" I said again to husband.  He seemed to register the oddness of it at the same time as me, and with both of us confident that we were a little too far from London for our dogs to be alerting Scotland Yard that the Dalmatians were missing, the boy got out of bed to check things out.

I laid in bed and listened to him walk into the living room and talk things over with the pups.  "What's going on Sawyer?" I heard him say.  I listened for their footsteps on the hardwood and heard the boy open the front door.  Then I heard him talking to someone.  Then I stopped breathing.  Who the f**k was on our front porch at 2:00am??  Next thing I know the door is closed and behind him and it's just me and the dogs in the house.

I continued to hold my breath.  Why do we hold our breath when we are straining to hear?  Like the lack of oxygen to my body will help me hear down the hallway and through the front door.  I can't hear anything, but after 7 hours passed (okay maybe it was 90 seconds) I was pretty positive he had been murdered on our front porch.  I got out of bed and decided I had to go outside and see what was going on.

For some reason, at 2:00 in the morning I own exactly zero clothing.  Literally.  For the life of me, I stood in my underwear staring at the outline of my closet and dresser, thinking the word "pants" over and over but I could not remember where any pants were.  Not sure why it mattered at that point, but I did not want to walk into the massacre I was convinced was waiting for me on my front porch in what husband referred to as my "granny panties."  Think Taryn....think.  Pants.  Pants.  What are pants?  My mind does not work at 2:00am.  Eventually I made my way to the dirty clothes basket in our room and found something with 2 leg holes in it.  I stumbled into the living room and stared at the front door, not sure if it was a trap to snag husband first and wait until I wandered outside into the same fate.  Again, I held my breath.  Our dogs had stopped barking and were sitting next to me waiting for the master they liked better to come back inside. 

All of a sudden, husband walked in the house.  "What the hell is going on?"  I said.  "The police are on our front porch.  Apparently one of the neighbors called them and said someone was trying to break into our cars."  Really?????  Nothing was missing, but it did not stop my husband from standing in our driveway in his boxers for 10 minutes talking to policemen on bicycles while several of our neighbors stood on their porches. Why is our life so weird?  And more importantly, why is it that people want to break into my piece of crap car all the time?  It only has 2 hubcaps for the love of God!  It's a 2003 Toyota...not a brand new Lexus!  Aside from a pile of receipts and an old yoga mat, there is nothing in my car.  Oddly enough, even though neither the boy or me remember locking our cars when we got home, they were both locked when we went to check things out.  Hmmmm....

By the time the ridiculousness of the evening settled in, I was already over it.  30 minutes of my precious sleep time on a weekday was enough for me, and I crawled back in bed, but not before making the boy check and re-check all the windows and doors to make sure they were locked.  I was already on my way back to sleepy-town when the boy launched back out of bed, having been clearly stewing over something he forgot to do.  He returned to our room with a baseball bat....because clearly a Louisville Slugger would stop the stray bullets should our petty car thief return and somehow manage to outsmart the locks on our front door, despite not being able to figure out the locks on our cars.

We lay quietly in bed, and just before falling back asleep I said, "I wouldn't be surprised if that damn home security salesman called the police and made up a story just to get a sale."  The boy's response...."I thought that too."

And that's why we have dogs. 

Our Wedding - The Ceremony

For months leading up to our wedding, I was nervous about the ceremony and whether or not I would do the ugly cry.  Let's face it...crying in front of people has never really been my thing.  Crying is something I typically do in the bathroom at work or behind the privacy of my bedroom door.  But seriously, the older I get, the more of a freakin' basketcase I become at weddings.  I find myself getting emotional at people's weddings I barely know (cut to me on our honeymoon watching an older couple get married on the other side of the beach whilst holding back tears).  So you can only imagine what I was worried about come my wedding day, not just for myself but also for my fiance who seems to have amnesia over the fact that he did indeed shed some tears the night he proposed. 

So, having cried at my bridesmaid luncheon, and cried (a somewhat ugly cry) at the rehearsal dinner, and cried when my sister gave me a card from my her and my brother-in-law before the ceremony, I had almost made peace with the fact that my ugly cry down the aisle and during my vows was imminent.

My brother walking my mom down the aisle

Mother of the Groom

By the time our outdoor ceremony started, it was pushing 106 degrees....the second hottest day on record.  I was secretly thanking the baby Jesus that the boy and I had collectively decided to have a short and sweet ceremony lasting about 20 minutes.  Luckily, the humidity was not in as full of effect as it had been the night before at the rehearsal, or we might not have made it down the aisle.  I could feel my heart beating out of my chest as we all peaked through the door of the welcome center and watched our guests make their way out to the ceremony seating, and I felt it even stronger watching my fiance and all the groomsmen clear out to take their walk up to the front behind our pastor.  After the boys took their leave, me, my Dad, and my bridesmaids hustled our way out to hide behind the shrubbery and listen for our cue in the music.  I stood behind there listening to Miles sing "The Luckiest" so beautifully with Jeanie on the piano and felt chills run up my arms. 

Once the solo was over, my heart jumped as I heard the first few notes of "A Thousand Years" by Christina Perri begin to play.  This was the cue for Brian (our pastor) to lead out the groomsmen to the front and begin the bridal processional.  When picking out the wedding music, I knew that I did not want to walk down the aisle to something completely traditional, but rather something that expressed my feelings in that moment.  When I first heard that song over a year ago, it gave me chills and the boy and I both agreed that we would have it in our wedding.  We had timed it out perfectly for the groom and groomsmen to enter followed by each bridesmaid, and me and my Dad at the crescendo at the end. 

Heart beats fast
Colors and promises
How to be brave
How can I love when I'm afraid to fall
But watching you stand alone
All of my doubt suddenly goes away somehow



One step closer....

I have died everyday waiting for you
Darling don't be afraid I have loved you
For a thousand years
I'll love you for a thousand more...

Time stands still
Beauty in all she is
I will be brave
I will not let anything take away
What's standing in front of me
Every breath
Every hour has come to this...

One step closer...

I have died everyday waiting for you
Darling don't be afraid I have loved you
For a thousand years
I'll love you for a thousand more

And all along I believed I would find you
Time has brought your heart to me
I have loved you for a thousand years
I'll love you for a thousand more

One step closer...

I have died everyday waiting for you
Darling don't be afraid I have loved you
For a thousand years
I'll love you for a thousand more

And all along I believed I would find you
Time has brought your heart to me
I have loved you for a thousand years
I'll love you for a thousand more.

As soon as I started walking down the aisle, I didn't cry.  I didn't even have the urge to.  I don't know what, but this weird feeling came over me like this was total normal.  I remember smiling a lot and looking at my future husband as I walked towards him.  When I got to the rows of seats, I remember looking and trying to remember everyone there and making eye contact with a lot of my friends.  It just seemed so crazy to have been to so many weddings and been in weddings and all of a sudden this was my wedding.  It was like I was surprised that all these people turned out for 'lil old us! 

When I got up next to the boy I remember looking at him a lot and trying very hard to concentrate on what Brian was saying so I didn't miss anything.  At one point, I heard him ask "Who presents this Woman..." and heard my Dad reply, "Her mother and I."  He kissed me on the cheek and sat down.  I took my love's hand and he whispered, "You look so beautiful."  That part I vividly remember. 

When we were planning our wedding ceremony, I wanted to have moments that I would remember clearly years from now.  We spoke with our pastor about having an opportunity to turn and face our guests during our ceremony while they all agreed to help lift us up and guide us on our journey of marriage...a moment it will be hard to forget. 



In all the months of planning and pondering on what our ceremony would include, I read through scores of bible verses trying to find the one that would best encompass all the thoughts and feelings and expectations we had regarding our marriage.  For some reason, nothing seemed quite right.  I moved on to love stories and poems and again fell short.  It wasn't until I came across an excerpt from "Union" by Robert Fulghum that we felt we had found exactly what we were looking for.  I asked my bridesmaid and dear friend Miranda to read it for us right before we began our vows.

You have known each other from the first glance of acquaintance to this point of commitment. At some point, you decided to marry. From that moment of yes, to this moment of yes, indeed, you have been making commitments in an informal way. All of those conversations that were held in a car, or over a meal, or during long walks – all those conversations that began with, “When we’re married”, and continued with “I will” and “you will” and “we will” – all those late night talks that included “someday” and “somehow” and “maybe” – and all those promises that are unspoken matters of the heart. All these common things, and more, are the real process of a wedding.

The symbolic vows that you are about to make are a way of saying to one another, “You know all those things that we’ve promised, and hoped, and dreamed – well, I meant it all, every word.”

Look at one another and remember this moment in time. Before this moment you have been many things to one another – acquaintance, friend, companion, lover, dancing partner, even teacher, for you have learned much from one another these past few years. Shortly you shall say a few words that will take you across a threshold of life, and things between you will never quite be the same.

For after today you shall say to the world –
This is my husband. This is my wife.

Everytime I read that, it gives me chills....for us, these words so perfectly explained everything we felt during our engagement and everything we wanted to remember about our wedding ceremony.  After the reading, we exchanged the traditional wedding vows, knowing that for us, that was enough. 

 After our vows, we exchanged rings as I clutched my great-grandmother's handkercheif that my mom carried on her wedding day and my sister carried on hers, and I waited to wipe tears that never came.  I just felt really, really happy.  And after we exchanged rings, we held hands, knowing that one day our hands would be old and wrinkled, but we would hold them together just the same. 

And then came the point we had been waiting for...those words that start with "I now pronounce you..." and end with was kiss.  And it's still amazing to me that after a million kisses with this man, it felt like the first kiss.  And it was...our first kiss as husband and wife.